1. Revamp my online presence
In other words, welcome! Yes, I am aware it isn't 2008, and that there are better ways to disseminate information than through a blog. Nevertheless, [fill in blank here about why the hell you're doing this].
[... Yes, that was satirical. I'm writing because a) its fun, and b) I need to remind you all of how witty and charming I am, in the hopes that you will pay me to be witty and charming for your media outlet].
2. Get C1 certified in France and B2 certified in Spanish
This one may be more difficult to achieve, given alliance française courses are running upwards of $600. Please see point #1 about the whole paying-me-to-write-for-your-media-outlet thing.
3. Finish draft of book and/or screenplay
To be fair, they're both the same concept, so I just need to decide which format is best to relay it (and which type of insufferable writer persona I'm going to adopt as a consequence).
4. Find an affordable studio in New York City and create a nest for myself
I'm talking Anthropologie candles, cheesy thrifted mugs — the whole shebang. Sans roaches, of course.
5. Bring back reaction gifs
I have to believe in myself! I am just ironic enough to actually pull it off!
6. Go to Mexico
Because Cancun doesn't count.
7. Get excommunicated from the Catholic Church (without giving my dad a stroke)
Did you know they don't let you quit on your own?
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